I wish my life was just a series of holy experiences with God. Sad to say, it’s been far from it. Like the apostle Paul, I feel that ”Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners — of whom I am the worst.”

My behavior spiraled downhill fast in high school, where there were three groups of kids: greasers with the “wet look,” collegiates/jocks with the “dry look,” and the dozen or so guys I hung out with. We had the dry look, but we weren’t nice.

Wherever we went we caused trouble. We regularly drank too much, started fights at football games and parties, and stole cars for joy rides in the wee hours of the morning.

I wish those things were the worst of it.

We had two unofficial leaders. We didn’t vote for them. They just naturally took charge and made sure we had something crazy to do almost every night.

One of these two leaders was an amazing fighter. He was only about my height, but like David against Goliath, he was fearless and would take on guys much bigger. And I never saw him lose a fight.

Our other leader didn’t look for fights. He looked for girls. He could handle most guys when needed, but he also had a unique bad-boy charm that the girls loved. As a result, he dated some of the brightest and most beautiful girls in school. He was the kind of guy that every daughter’s father hated, and why some bought shotguns.

We admired the leader who could fight so well, but we envied the ”lover.” And as pathetic as it seems now, he became our hero. We actually tried to emulate the guy who broke girls’ hearts. And some of us formed habits that went from bad to worse.

Even after God made Himself known to me, I found myself continuing my selfish actions, and needing to confess my sin afterward. And no matter how many times I watched Good Will Hunting or heard “it’s not your fault” from a well-intentioned minister or counselor, I knew deep down it was my fault. I was guilty. I needed a redeemer, and someone who would empower me to change.

Thank God for Jesus Christ and His willingness to pay the price for my sins and send His Holy Spirit to us all.

Do you not know that the wicked will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor male prostitutes nor homosexual offenders nor thieves nor the greedy nor drunkards nor slanderers nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. And that is what some of you were. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.     – I Cor. 6:9-11

Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed….     – James 5:16